Being inspired by friends

I have not been motivated to draw for quite some time now. I tried challenging myself, and sometimes I will even complete the challenge, but I lack motivation and inspiration, and so I feel like my art is lacking something. Even the projects about the very cool ideas aren't seeing any work, because I just don't like the way my art looks, and can't see the point in ruining the cool ideas with awful art. When I see art by other artists, it's really difficult to not hate my own stuff, or be stupidly jealous. (Having other people admire someone else's art also isn't helping, but I will count that among the ways stupid envy can ruin your self esteem.) 

So I have only been drawing small things for myself that noone else will ever see, and was lacking the motivation for anything else. But, rater unexpectedly, someone really tiny has -without really trying to- found a way to use my jealousy to fight my lack of motivation.
Sovereign Light Café, Take II







About a year ago, the tiny person made a fan-video, set to the song "Sovereign Light Café" by Keane. I really liked it, and wanted to do more than just say that, so I drew some fanart. 


Sovereign Light Café, Take I
 It wasn't actually any good at all. The only thing I liked about it were parts of the water, and maybe the coast on the other side. 
But please bear in mind that I wasn't really comfortable with watercolour pencils (nvm paints), or with drawing people, or with actually executing a concept. I drew a thing because I felt like it, and this was the result.

Whenever I looked at it after finishing it, I felt that there were a lot of things wrong with it. But I didn't want to deal with it, or try again and maybe manage to fix it. I wanted to forget it and move on. 



Artwork by @floralcar
Then the tiny person happened. Having previously enjoyed colouring in adult colouring books, and drawing super-cute digital stickmen art, she suddenly decided to buy watercolour pencils and set out to draw cute things with them. Although way more stylized, this was so much prettier than my crappy drawing from a year back. And that one hadn't even been my first outing with watercolour pencils. 

The tiny person tends to say that she is not an artist. But to me, looking at her drawings and comparing to some of my own I have never liked anyway, it felt like I wasn't an artist either. 
This is of course not a very productive mindset, and after running around in circles for a few days, my brain finally reached the same conclusion.

At first, I thought about redrawing my hideous first attempt. But apart from it being hideous, I also didn't like the composition and the details, so a redraw was out of the questions. Eventually my randomized audio player suggested that I should listen to the song in the video again. I quite like the lyrics, but I had forgotten some of them, and upon remembering, they provided me with a setting I might like to draw. Then I drew in a tiny person waving, just for fun, and because this all came from a shipping video, I added another tall someone with a big belly in the front. When I had finished my pencil sketch, I just felt like using my ink pens, and thus the style is really rather different. But I have to say that I'm somewhat proud of it. It is not exactly as I pictured it, and I am spectacularly bad at using the highlighter properly. But I like how the design went, and how the combination of ink pens and watercolour (pencils) worked for me. And it made me want to draw again.
It seems that sometimes all it takes is a tiny kick in the behind, even it was unintentional from the person doing the kicking.

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